Every Wednesday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night, my bedtime TV viewing is fixed on the Cutlery Corner Network aka The Knife Show. While I have absolutely no interest in collecting knives nor am I a hunter or a redneck, I still find this home shopping program to be entirely amusing and often hilarious.

The southern-accented hosts spend hours on each of those nights getting excited about extremely low prices on mass quantities of knives. The regular knife-selling isn’t all that interesting, but it’s the appearances by the program’s personalities that make it all worth watching.

In particular, it’s always entertaining when Jim Frost, the owner of Frost Cutlery, makes an appearance with his “little buddy” Mary, who I believe works there boxing up knives to ship out to customers. Evidently Mary’s time on TV has become so popular that Cutlery Corner has even released special pink knives with engraved versions of her face of them. She also occasionally has her own “mystery box” offer, where customers plunk down cash without knowing exactly what knife they’ll be getting.

And today, the day after Valentine’s Day and many months into regularly subjecting my wife to Cutlery Corner viewings, I received a surprise in the mail. Michelle purchased Mary’s Valentine’s Day Mystery Box for me.

I have no idea what I’m going to do with these knives, but they sure are hilarious.

I should also mention that as a joke, I had put one of the Mary knives in Michelle’s Christmas stocking. She has no idea what she’ll do with hers either, but now we have a set of them.

Make sure to tune in to the Cutlery Corner network. It’s on several channels on DirecTV and cable on the nights listed above. Check your local listings.