I’ll admit I’m a bit of a music snob. Nearly all popular music does not appeal to my ears. However, I can still understand why pop music is loved by many. But when children are grouped together to cover contemporary music for the sake of relating it to a younger generation (and supposedly cleaning it up), that’s when I cringe. Unfortunately, that act has happened 15 times in the form of…

Kiz Bop Music

Before I get into it, here’s a sample:

 

Would you believe that’s only the latest installment of 15 Kiz Bop albums (in addition to several other themed collections)?

You might be asking: ”What’s so bad about children singing popular songs?” Plenty.

This week, I’ll go for a three-pronged attack:

Covers of songs are fine, and sometimes better than the originals, when actual musicians are performing them. Do we need to “dumb” these songs down for children by having kids sing them instead of real artists?

There is already enough wrong with the over-commercialized world of music today. Vocals from artists who have little talent are digitally enhanced so they are at least in tune. Real instruments are replaced by samples and loops. Now we expect children to properly appreciate music by listening to other kids sing?

Now, I realize that many would say that much of today’s popular music contains lyrics that are not appropriate for children to hear. I don’t necessarily see that as true, as I was listening to Dr. Dre’s The Chronic when I was only 11 years old. I knew enough not to repeat its many swear words in public. Why are today’s children being babied so much?

But despite the fact that Kidz Bop changes some of the lyrics to its songs to make them more wholesome, they are still fooling parents with these supposedly child-friendly albums. Which brings me to…  
 

2. Inappropriate Lyrics

Again, I’m not fond of the act of censoring any songs for childrens’ sake. But, if it’s going to happen, at least do it right. Don’t trick parents into thinking that the song selection is carefully chosen and lyrics are carefully altered (as they’ve stated here) to make the songs appropriate for kids. Kidz Bop certainly claims to be doing this.

 An example: “Disturbia” by Rihanna

This song was featured in the above commercial as a selling point for the album. The song, among other things, describes a mental place in which one is confused about life. I could see that relating to children. But, the song does contain this lyric:

Faded pictures on the wall, it’s like they talking to me
Disconnecting on calls, the phone don’t even ring
I gotta get out or figure this sh** out
It’s too close for comfort, oh

I’m not a parent, but I’ll guess that most parents who are concerned enough about music content to buy their kids a Kidz Bop album wouldn’t want this lyric sounding out in their house. Of course, Kidz Bop censors the lyric… but does anyone really think kids aren’t going to want to seek out the original after hearing the butchered version on the Kidz Bop CD? And won’t they hear the original lyric then? And potentially want to sing along with it?

If you don’t think this would happen, check this out. Kidz Bop encourages children to upload videos of themselves singing to their Web site, like a mini-YouTube. In this case, young Paige decided to sing along with the original Rihanna version of the song. It turns out it was the radio edit, where the swear word is muted, but you certainly still get the idea.

This is just one of many, many, many examples of songs that make their way onto Kidz Bop that will likely be seen as inappropriate for children by the very parents that hope to buy a CD that contains nothing but appropriate material. Nice work, Kidz Bop!

For some real humor on this subject, don’t miss this Kidz Bop parody video.
 

3. Annoyance Factor

This is the most petty of my three complaints, but I’m sticking to it. These songs sung by children are simply annoying. Couldn’t Kidz Bop have gotten some individual, talented kids to sing them rather than just lumping a bunch of kids together and having them all sing simultaneously?

Despite the fact that I think most of the songs featured on Kidz Bop are not good in their original form, they’re a thousand times worse when the backing tracks are re-synthesized and the vocals replaced with sub-par singing from children. It all just seems like an attempt to capitalize on the popularity of ‘tweens’ uploading videos to YouTube of themselves dancing around to various songs. Oh wait, that’s exactly what it is.

Don’t buy this garbage. Subjecting your kids to listening to poorly-covered pop songs sung by children is not the way to get them to appreciate music. There is absolutely nothing artistic about Kidz Bop.

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